BREAKING: AOC invents non-electronic Email
In what will be known as the greatest invention of all time, US Representative Alexandria Ocasio Cortez (D-NY) has invented a non-electronic form of Email in an effort to save the US Post Office from budget cuts.
“I know this may seem far out there, but what if there was a way we could send emails and even text messages through the US Post Office,” Ocasio-Cortez announced at the International Communist Scientist Forum in New York. “You could, like, type up your email or your text, print it out on a printer and put it in the mail and physically send it to the person you are trying to email or text.”
“It’s not going to be perfect since it’ll take a little bit longer than email or text to get there, but it will save the post office!” Ocasio-Cortez said.
AOC has filed the ingenious invention with the US Patent and Trademark Office and it will be registered within the next year, so fans can look for the new letter writing iPhone app to be available shortly after that.
“What’s amazing about this invention is that you don’t even have to type your letter. You could write it with a pen or pencil or finger paint and send it through my invention too!”
“Well, thinking about it a little more, maybe it’s not such a good idea,” AOC admitted. “Instead, maybe we just give the USPS fifty cents for every email and text people send in the US. That will fix it!”