New Yorkers are notorious for dropping the letter ‘r’ in every word they say. Literally. Like the word lobster sounds like “lobsta”, park sounds like “pak”, and New York sounds like “New Yawk”. Hey, they even botch their own state’s name! To fix this long and overdue injustice, NY Gov. Kathy Hochul has officially renamed the state “New Yawk.”

“This is a very special day for New Yawk and New Yawkas everywhere,” Hochul said. “All residents of ouwa amazing state – from the police depawments to the firefightaws – will be finally able to pronounce the state’s name correctly. It’s about time.”

Since New Yawkas don’t use the letter “r” anyway, the State is officially dropping the letter from the entire alphabetical system.

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Rafi Metz

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