Trump Promises to Give You Some of Your Money if GOP Wins
DALLAS — President Donald Trump announced this week that he would let every American have a little bit of their money if the Republicans win in the November midterms.
The money, he said, would be called the Trump Dividend and would come from debt that the American people will be paying off for the next 100 years.
“If the Republicans win, you win with us and you get $5,000,” Trump told the party’s midterm convention. “That alone should win the midterms.”
Officials later confirmed the arithmetic. There are roughly 245 million adult citizens. Five thousand dollars each comes to about $1.2 trillion.
The White House presented the arrangement as a return on investment. Americans would vote, the correct party would keep its majorities, and a fraction of what they had already paid would be mailed back to them with a new name on the envelope.
Aides noted that Congress would still have to approve the checks. A Republican senator said he would introduce a bill the day after the election. No one explained what would happen if the election produced a different Congress than the one required to pass the bill.
The president has made similar offers before. A $2,000 tariff dividend was described last year as imminent. It did not arrive. A smaller “warrior dividend” was issued to members of the military. This version is larger, more widely distributed, and more explicitly tied to a single Tuesday in November.
The only spending restriction is geographic. Recipients may not take the money to Canada, China, or Germany. They may take it to a store that already collects sales tax.
Democrats called the proposal a bribe. Republicans called it a dividend. Budget analysts called it a transfer. The public was asked to regard it as a gift.
A spokesperson for the Treasury said the department was prepared to print the checks if instructed. A spokesperson for the White House said the country was “making so much money” that the gesture was affordable. Neither spokesperson was asked whose money it had been first.
The midterms are November 3. The checks, if they exist, would follow. The money, in any case, is already here.
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