WASHINGTON, DC—Black Lives Matter and Antifa are disappointed over not having any excuses to riot once Trump leaves office.

“I’m really gonna miss stealing all those flat-screen TV’s and gaming devices from Walmart – in the name of racial justice of course – now that Trump’s gonna be out of the White House,” a mostly peaceful BLM activist said. “Once he’s out I’ll have no reasons or excuses to riot and loot like I’ve been doing for the past four years, and I’m afraid BLM’s gonna go out of business. I’m really afraid of the future.”

A local fascist-Antifascist activist also expressed similar concerns. “I used to get up early every morning in my mother’s basement to protest in the streets against how much of a fascist and dictator Trump’s been as president without any repercussions, which I found odd considering the guy’s literally Hitler. But now that he’s leaving office, what am I gonna protest against for the next four years?”

We were later notified that the white supremacist community was also disappointed but for the opposite reason – that Trump didn’t end up being ‘literally just like Hitler’.

On behalf of the Genesius Times, we expressed our condolences to all parties for their loss.

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Rafi Metz

Rafi is the king of satire, a master of his trade. Nobody is immune to his hyperbolic and satirical outrage. Nobody is spared from being the object of his incessant mockery. Because at the end of the day, everyone is a parody of themselves.

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