WASHINGTON, DC—Friends, I had another deep thought that I’d like to share.

Lots of capitalist monsters try to say that the economy is so bad now and they can’t afford food, blah blah blah.

But that’s just baloney (and I don’t mean the processed meat because you probably can’t afford that). I mean the political baloney.

The recession isn’t bad. If the recession was so awful, then tell me why all my friends in DC are getting so rich?

Did you know that socialism is the best way to transfer wealth from everyday people like you to the people in power in Washington DC, like me? It’s proven to be true, time and time again.

Maybe, if you can’t afford gas or food or whatever, you should just become a politician. Have you thought of that?

That way, you don’t have to produce anything and you can get insider information into stock tips, like my dear friend Nancy Pelosi. Or you can get a book deal for a book that no one will buy like my friend Bernie Sanders who wrote the excellent book “How to get rich complaining about wealth inequality.”

If you’re struggling in this recession, you’re an idiot.

That’s all I have to say about that right now.

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