BREAKING: Congress narrowly averts being fiscally responsible again
US—Democrats helped Kevin McCarthy pass the controversial debt limit deal he made with President Joe Biden that will suspend the...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Chik-fil-A to serve only dark chicken meat per new Diversity, Equity and Inclusion guideline
In a surprising and potentially controversial move, fast-food chain Chik-fil-A announced its newest initiative aimed at promoting diversity, equity, and...
Biden: ‘This Memorial Day remember all those trans activists who died in the Revolutionary War’
In a surprising and imaginative turn of events, President Joe Biden took a moment during a Memorial Day press conference...
Biden unveils new pride flag to be flown at all US embassies
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden unveiled a new Pride flag that will be flown at all US embassies around the country and...
BREAKING: FBI forgets to take their logo off van before false flag White House attack
In a stunning display of oversight, the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) recently found itself in an embarrassing predicament when...
Biden executive order punishes parents who don’t chop off the arms of kids who identify as T-Rex
WASHINGTON, DC–President* Joe Biden signed legislation yesterday that criminalizes parents who don't chop off the arms of their children who...
You’re a Nazi if you don’t support mutilating children
I don't know who needs to hear this but the Texas legislature just passed a law that bans people from...
BREAKING: Justice Department has investigated itself and found it did nothing wrong
WASHINGTON, DC—Department of Justice special counsel John Durham, who has been examining abuses during the Russia investigation, has successfully secured...
BREAKING: CNN to air constant reruns of Trump townhall to boost ratings
ATLANTA—In a desperate attempt to boost their ratings, CNN has announced that they will be foregoing all other programming and...
Local dad’s joke fails to get any laughs
Local dad, Jim Johnson, made a valiant attempt at humor yesterday during a family gathering, but unfortunately failed to get...
