Biden to mandate coverage for 3-year-olds who want to transition to T-Rex

WASHINGTON DC—Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden took a brave and stunning stand again LGBTQ+ discrimination in his town hall Thursday.

Biden fielded the question from a mother of a 3-year-old trans-species tyrannosaurus rex who cited several of the Trump administration’s anti-trans-species policies, including the ban on T-Rexes serving openly in the military, and then asked Biden how he would protect the “lives and rights of lesbian, gay, and tyrannosaurus rex people.”

“I will flat out just change the law, eliminate those executive orders,” Biden, the Democratic presidential nominee, said. “There should be zero discrimination. I mean, if we’re going to be real, the military should love a couple T-Rexes in the ranks! If a 3-year-old thinks he’s T-Rex, we need to pump him up with hormones and cut off his arms.”

Biden explained, “If a 3-year-old thinks he’s a T-Rex, then by God, he’s a frickin’ T-Rex and there ain’t nobody who can tell him otherwise.”

The mother then corrected Biden who misgendered her child.

“Actually my T-Rex child is non-binary and their pronouns are they and tiger blood,” the mother said.

“Well, I think that’s just great,” Biden said. “When I become president, I’m going to mandate insurance companies cover kids who want to transition to tyrannosaurus rexes or anything else the hell they want to transition to. I don’t care.”