Facebook’s sanctions now include labeling platform offenders with scarlet “A”

In an attempt to ‘moderate the hate’ on their platform, Facebook has rolled out a novel punishment for repeat offenders. They slap a big, ugly, scarlet “A” across the offenders profile photo.

With one glance now, users across the social media giant can effortlessly identify trolls, hate mongers, and ‘triggering’ conservatives. This is totally not like that stupid bigoted novel by Nathaniel Hawthorne with which high school English teachers terrorized us.

For those who have not been in high school for some time, it is a story about judgy judgementalists judging adulterers for no good reason. Maybe they are just into ethical polyamory? Mind your own business!

This instead is a feat of justice. Now when people advance ideas that enlightened progressives consider dangerous and hurtful we can see their dubious intentions scribed right across their profile.

It’s about time Zuckerberg considered my feelings when navigating the minefields of conservative hate! Keep your stupid opinions to your stupid selves conservatives and Zuck won’t have to whip out the big ol’ scarlet A on your hateful asses!