BREAKING: Biden cancels MLK Day because ‘he ain’t black’
WASHINGTON, DC—Joe Biden isn’t even president yet and he’s already shaking things up. Biden unilaterally
woke
Goodyear introduces new 2020 tires that only make left turns
Going all in on its recent zero tolerance for conservatives policy, Goodyear Tire Company is
Nike makes sweatshop workers work overtime to stitch ‘Equality’ on NBA jerseys
BEAVERTON, OR—Nike has agreed to force its thousands of sweatshop workers to work overtime for
Urban Dictionary to add 347,823 new non-binary pronouns in 2020 in order to alleviate confusion
In a stunning revelation, the New Urban Dictionary is about to reveal almost 350,000 new
Man accidentally wins Nobel Prize after constantly complaining about the heat
Local resident Sam Bilkie has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize after consistent complaining
BREAKING: Obama, Clintons revealed to be white supremacists
As everyone is aware, the “okay” hand gesture is a longtime white supremacist symbol, and
BREAKING: Local man nominated for Nobel Prize after constantly complaining about the heat
Local resident Sam Bilkie has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize after consistent complaining
Facebook’s sanctions now include labeling platform offenders with scarlet “A”
In an attempt to ‘moderate the hate’ on their platform, Facebook has rolled out a
Nike to make only satin jerseys because cotton reminds Kaepernick of slavery
BEAVERTON, OR—Nike is making waves once again this month in effort to appease their sponsored
Woke Sysco employees protest sale of food to border detention camp
Super-woke employees at Sysco’s Boston headquarters left their offices Wednesday afternoon to protest the company’s
