A new pandemic is quickly approaching America. Just when you thought 2020 could not any worse, here we go again with another one!
The new pandemic’s virus has already affected 50 percent of Americans and may or may not be gaining momentum, we don’t trust the polls enough to say. The new virus is a mutation of the previously thought to be semi-harmless virus called Trump derangement syndrome (TDS). TDS has morphed into something much more sinister, that being Inevitable Biden Syndrome (IBS).
Yes, this is a real virus!
“Of course it’s real,” said Dr. Anthony Fauci, “What else, other than a virus could cause American voters to support Biden in spite of him clearly having dementia and narcolepsy?”
Symptoms of this deadly IBS include fever, headache, verbal diarrhea, and burning your city to the ground.
We asked Dr. Fauci for further evidence of this new pandemic virus, to which he informed us that Biden fell asleep on live TV while receiving Hilary Clinton’s endorsement. No further evidence of a new virus is needed.
Dr. Fauci also informed us that the only reason he had agreed to talk to us is because he does not want to be known as the coronavirus doctor.
“I’m not worried about the new virus,” said President Trump, “if everyone stays in their homes, this will blow over. Please, stay in your homes.” This statement was given via twitter, as Trump does not want to leave his home.
No word yet on what causes libertarianism.