STOCKHOLM—The Nobel Committee has proven that they are not racist by giving the Nobel Peace Prize to Greta Thunberg for her tireless work in the Black Live Matter movement.
“It is fitting that BLM receive our human rights prize, since they are taking action on racism,” said Swedish Prime Minister Stefan Löfven, “and we felt that no one better represented that movement than Greta Thunberg.”
Thunberg made waves last summer when CNN put her on the panel What It’s Like Being Black in America.
The prize Sweden is giving totals $100,000 and half a dozen empty cans of diet soda. The prize will be donated online this Saturday via Paypal.
Members of the Swedish parliament stated that they were happy to assist BLM financially but that all the money must go through George Soros or Planned Parenthood.
We tried to contact Greta Thunberg for comment, but she was detained while flying on a private jet to a climate change seminar.
BLM has also been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize by Norwegian MP Petter Eide.
“We must call attention to the causes of peace and tolerance, which BLM promotes,” said Eide. MP Eide also informed us that he has never been to a BLM rally and that he and his staff get all of their information on American politics from MSNBC.
BLM Sean King was furious that Thunberg got the prize for BLM.
“This is an outrage that a white girl should be awarded for black lives matter,” said King, who is lighter skinned than Thunberg.
King continued, “Because Sweden remains racist to this day, we will not be accepting their money. Sweden was one of the last countries to abolish slavery. Sweden has also promoted forced sterilization, and the pseudo-science of racial biology. So no, my grass roots movement will survive by the donations of a dozen or so American corporations.”