BREAKING: Sen Van Hollen claims it’s ‘disgusting’ that Kilmar Garcia can’t be home in Maryland to beat his wife on Easter like he used to 
AOC vows to torch her Tesla made by that ‘stupid billionaire’ as soon as she figures out how those magic firesticks work 
Catholic Nuns Cure ADHD With Simple Life Hack 
Local liberal agonizes over which cold-blooded murderer to support today 
Scientists now say that burning Teslas to the ground is better for the environment than not doing so 
Biden Confuses Juneteenth Festival for Cotton Picking Festival
In a shocking and unexpected turn of events, President* Joe Biden was seen at a Juneteenth festival at the White...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Democrats terrified that if Trump is elected, he’ll do exactly what they’re doing to him and his supporters
US—Democrats have become increasingly terrified that if Donald Trump is elected president again, he will do exactly what they're doing...
Biden recalls D-Day invasion when He & Beau stormed Normandy Beach
In a touching and unexpected tribute to the heroes of D-Day, President Joe Biden was able to tell a harrowing...
Activists furious that people are driving on the rainbow murals they painted on streets where cars go
US--LGBTQFJB+ activists around the country are livid after it has become apparent that people are driving over the murals they...
Biden pledges $300 million to rebuild the ‘sagging infrastructure’ of Maxine Waters’ face
President* Joe Biden has pledged $300 million to rebuild the "sagging infrastructure" of Congresswoman Maxine Waters' face, in an effort...
First pile of feces who identifies as a beautiful woman is crowned Miss America
Chet, the first human turd who identified as a beautiful woman, has been crowned Miss America, in a groundbreaking and...
Inflation forces annual Miss Alabama Competition & State Hot Dog Eating Contest to combine shows this year
President* Biden's inflationary policies have forced the annual Miss Alabama Competition and State Hot Dog Eating Contest to combine shows...
Biden: ‘The true heroes of D-Day were the drag queens and trans activists’
In a stunning announcement, President Joe Biden has taken a bold step to reshape the historical narrative of World War...
BREAKING: Dems warn that if Trump’s elected, he may try to close the border and prevent WWIII
In a startling revelation, Democratic strategists are sounding the alarm, cautioning voters that if Donald Trump is reelected, he might...
Local drag queens to host story hour at maximum security prison to prove that they’re not just groomers
Several local drag queens have announced plans to host a story hour at a maximum-security prison, in an effort to...
