Portland offers free hits of crack with proof of COVID vaccination

PORTLAND, OR—Residents of Portland are lining up to receive their free hits of crack rock—a little extra incentive for receiving the COVID vaccination.

And it isn’t just a one-time offer — those with vaccine cards can return every day through the end of 2021 for free hits on a crack pipe.

On the its website, Portland Health Administration says those who want the free hallucination-inducing smoke must present a Covid-19 vaccination record card indicating that they have received at least one shot of the Moderna or Pfizer vaccines, or the single shot Johnson & Johnson vaccine. The company will not honor vaccine stickers or marker tattoos.

“Providing free crack rock to those who get vaccinated is just another gesture that we hope invigorates people’s lives as the country accelerates to put this virus behind us,” Portland Health Advisor Dick Firkin said in a statement to Genesius Times.

Portland offers up to four hours of paid time off to its employees to facilitate them getting vaccinated. The municipality is also planning on sending free crack to select vaccination centers around the country in the coming weeks to “support health care workers and volunteers who are helping administer vaccines.”

“We need people to be healthy, and if they require the incentive of a little crack rock to be healthy, then we’re all for it,” Firkin added.

The city also provides face masks with holes in them so that residents can be healthy while smoking their crack rock.

Hunter Biden endorsed the campaign and was one of its first recipients.