Rey employs practical new light saber in ‘Rise of Skywalker’

Throwing out all the stops for the last in the latest Star Wars trilogy, producers at Disney have given the central character Rey a Swiss army knife light saber.

“They’re really trying to make this latest effort spectacular,” Star Wars fanatic Bubba Fett of Little Rock, Arkansas said. “The Swiss Army light saber is spectacular but also highly practical. You can open up a bottle with it or thread a needle as well as impale your enemy.”

After changing the name from Episode IX: The Search For More Money to Rise of Skywalker, Disney needed something to really charge up audiences and fans.

“This should do it!”

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