Study Finds There Are 11 Types of People in this World: Those who Understand Roman Numerals and Ilhan Omar
WASHINGTON — In a breakthrough that scholars are calling “both mathematically dubious and emotionally consistent,” a new report released Tuesday confirmed that there are, in fact, 11 types of people in the world: those who understand Roman numerals, and Ilhan Omar.
The finding, published by the nonpartisan Institute for Numerical Literacy, has already upended centuries of binary thinking. “For too long, we’ve forced humanity into two categories,” said lead researcher Dr. Alan Pritchard. “But once you account for XI, everything changes. Especially when one of the categories appears to be operating on an entirely different numbering system.”
The report comes amid renewed attention to Omar’s recent remarks, in which she appeared to endorse what aides later described as “learning (D)ifferently,” a pedagogical framework that experts say places less emphasis on conventional arithmetic and more on “vibes, reinterpretation, and selective numeral appreciation.”
Critics have pointed to the congresswoman’s evolving relationship with numbers as evidence of confusion, though supporters argue it reflects a bold rethinking of Western numerical norms. “Why should X always mean ten?” asked one ally. “Why can’t it be aspirational? Or symbolic? Or, in some cases, just sort of close enough?”
In a press conference intended to clarify her position, Omar announced she would henceforth go by “Elevenhan Omar” to ensure consistency with the newly established 11-type framework. “It’s important that our identities align with inclusive counting systems,” she said, adding that “ten-plus-one is just another way of expressing lived experience.”
When asked whether this rebranding might create confusion, Omar appeared unfazed. “Confusion is just understanding that hasn’t fully arrived yet,” she explained. “Some people learn differently. Some people learing differently.”
The slip was quickly embraced by supporters, who have begun circulating merchandise emblazoned with the phrase “Learing Is Believing,” while detractors noted that the typo seemed to reinforce the very concerns it was meant to dispel.
Meanwhile, educators across the country are scrambling to adapt. Several school districts have already announced pilot programs replacing traditional Roman numeral instruction with what administrators are calling “interpretive enumeration.” Early lesson plans encourage students to “feel out” whether VII is closer to 6, 7, or “a strong 8 energy.”
Despite the controversy, experts agree on one point: the original premise remains intact.
“There are still two types of people,” said Dr. Pritchard. “Those who understand Roman numerals, and those who are now bravely expanding the category to eleven.”
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