MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—Google’s media giant YouTube has been banned indefinitely from its own video streaming service for violating its community standards of not allowing anyone to contradict the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

“CDC Head Rochelle Walensky recently said that COVID vaccinees can spread COVID just as much as the unvaccinated, contradicting her earlier statement that people vaccinated from COVID cannot spread the disease. Therefore, anyone who posts videos of Walensky or and CDC spokesperson speaking violates our rule against ever contradicting the CDC,” YouTube CEO Susan Wojcicki said in a video posted on the competitor website Rumble.com.

YouTube is the leading corporation in the fight for more censorship since it controls a majority of the online video services in the world.

“It’s a matter of life and death,” Wojcicki said. “If you contradict the CDC, you’re going to kill people with COVID-19, so we must listen to the CDC, especially when they contradict themselves. Therefore, we had no choice but to ban ourselves for contradicting our own terms of service.”

Following the decision, President* Biden appointed Wojcicki to head his newly formed Ministry of Truth led by Facebook’s Mark Zuckerface, and Twatter’s Jazz Dorkey.

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Exavier Saskagoochie

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