BREAKING: Biden devours several children in playful new Halloween sacrifice ritual at White House
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has been caught on camera devouring several children in a new Halloween sacrifice tradition at the...
Year: 2024
BREAKING: Newly pregnant AOC to have abortion on CNN to boost ratings
ATLANTA—Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has agreed to appear on CNN for a special episode titled "Abortion on the Air: AOC's Decision."...
BREAKING: Oscar the Grouch Endorses Trump After Biden’s Garbage Comment
SESAME STREET—Long time resident Oscar the Grouch surprised the nation today by officially endorsing Donald Trump for president, citing President...
Biden: ‘Garbage Trump supporters need to tone down the rhetoric or I’ll annihilate them all with tactical nukes and F-18s’
WASHINGTON, DC—In yet another one of his signature "folksy" moments, President* Joe Biden addressed escalating political tensions during a recent...
BREAKING: Tim Walz to Star in Brokeback Mountain 2: A Heartfelt Tale of a Man and His Horse
Hollywood insiders are buzzing over the announcement that Minnesota Governor Tim Walz will star in the long-anticipated sequel to Brokeback...
Tim Walz: ‘Those dipsh*t Nazi Republicans need to knock it off with the name-calling’
In a bold and impassioned speech from the steps of the Minnesota State Capitol, Democratic Vice Presidential Nominee Tim Walz...
Democrats stunned to learn that hatred of Trump can’t buy groceries or gas
Democratic voters nationwide are coming to the grim realization that seething hatred for Donald Trump isn’t an acceptable form of...
WaPo can’t choose between Harris or Hitler; will stay neutral in 2024 election
In a surprising editorial move, The Washington Post has announced that it will officially remain neutral in the 2024 presidential...
Kamala responds to 3-hour-longTrump interview on Joe Rogan with 18 minutes of her cackling at questions she can’t answer
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a move that has left political pundits scratching their heads and late-night comedians thanking their lucky...
Leonardo DiCaprio lands private jet to endorse Kamala Harris on his private yacht because climate change
In a bold and groundbreaking move to combat climate change, Leonardo DiCaprio has decided to take a private jet from...
