BREAKING: Walz launches MICE to deport ‘invading’ Americans out of Minnesota
ST. PAUL, Minn. — In what aides are calling the most Minnesotan solution to an increasingly un-Minnesotan problem, Governor Tim...
Year: 2026
Escape from New York: 2026: New York is a communist utopia sealed off by mountains of garbage
In a bold move to update John Carpenter's 1981 masterpiece for the modern viewer who prefers their dystopias pre-approved by...
AOC: If socialism doesn’t work, why are all my socialist friends in DC multi-millionaires?
WASHINGTON, DC—Friends, I had another deep thought that I'd like to share. Lots of idiots out there say that socialism...
Bruce Springsteen releases ‘Born in the Somali-A’ in tribute of the financially savvy immigrants
In a bold artistic pivot that has left fans and critics alike reaching for their tax returns, Bruce Springsteen today...
BREAKING: Trump Ends Minnesota Standoff by Trading Minneapolis for Alberta, Canada
Washington, D.C. – In a move described by White House officials as "the art of the deal on a continental...
Democrats hand out fake Social Security cards to illegal immigrants during a ‘No One Is Above the Law’ rally
Washington, D.C. – In what organizers are calling a "bold step toward inclusive justice," top Democrats hosted a star-studded "No...
Bruce Springsteen threatens to make Republicans listen to his music until deportations end
In a dramatic escalation of his long-running feud with conservative America, Bruce Springsteen has issued what aides are calling his...
JUST IN: Ilhan Omar opens ‘Quality Akting Skool’ following Oscar win
In a development that has Academy voters and conspiracy theorists alike double-checking their popcorn supplies, Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) announced...
LIFE HACK: How to write off your involuntary donation to ‘Quality Learing Center’ on your taxes
In these trying economic times, savvy taxpayers are always on the lookout for clever ways to reduce their burden to...
BREAKING: People who want to tax cow farts are upset about Trump’s tariffs
WASHINGTON, DC—Green New Deal Democrats are reportedly fuming over President Trump’s latest tariff announcements—not because of trade imbalances or economic...
