Inflation has been hitting virtually every major sector of the economy – from gas at the pump, to food, to lumber. We’ve all felt the effects of inflation personally in our daily lives, and it hasn’t been pretty to say the least. So it may come as a surprise to you that inflation has hit an unlikely target, one place that you’d least expect it to reach – and that’s everyone’s favorite game show, Wheel of Fortune.

According to The Washington Post, the price of vowels has increased by five percent since July of this year. Experts say the shortage is connected to the current supply chain crisis, as reports show that thousands of vowels are stuck at major ports throughout the country, and the shortage has caused prices to increase. Experts also say that there are hundreds of vowels still stuck in Afghanistan thanks to President Brandon, which has caused a shortage of vowels in the United States.

“Buying vowels is a staple of the game show,” Wheel of Fortune host Pat Sajak said. “As someone who’s been selling vowels since 1981, I understand more than anyone else how these price increases will hurt the middle-class. It’s an unfortunate situation.”

To help alleviate the crisis, language experts recommend that vowels on the show should be kept to a minimum, similar to how people text each other. For example, instead of the phrase “Type writers are extinct”, the newly-worded phrase would be, “Typ wrtrs r xtnct.” Or instead of “Drink responsibly”, it would be “Drnk rspnsbly.” Or instead of “Happily ever after”, it would be “Hpply evr ftr.”

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Rafi Metz

Rafi is the king of satire, a master of his trade. Nobody is immune to his hyperbolic and satirical outrage. Nobody is spared from being the object of his incessant mockery. Because at the end of the day, everyone is a parody of themselves.

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