BRONX, NY—US Congressman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) announced on Twitch that she is feeling depressed lately because the media is paying attention to Joe Biden instead of her.
“I used to get so much attention whenever I said something stupid but Joe Biden stole my gig and everybody forgot about me,” said the congressman between video games. “It’s because of systemic racism.”
With the Presidential election looming, most national media is focused on the candidates, leaving AOC outside the spotlight. “My USPS pen pal idea made a few waves, but then it was back to ‘Joe Biden this’ and ‘Donald Trump that.'”
She told the audience to expect an official statement from her soon that will launch her back into headlines. Viewers asked if she plans to play the victim hood card or the race card.
“Neither,” she responded. “That’s midterm election material. I need to get crazy dumb to overshadow the competition.”
“After this margarita I’m going to work, like, super hard on a legislative plan so outrageously stupid, it will make the Green New Deal seem sane by comparison.”
Three drinks later, Ocasio-Cortez ended the call telling the audience, “Socialism works and everyone else is a Nazi.”
Pundits are unsure if that was her big announcement or not.