REDMOND, WA—Billionaire and Bond Supervillain Bill Gates is incresingly infuriated that doctors and health practitioners keep coming up with simple and cheap cures to his coronavirus bioweapon.

“We worked very hard on this disease to, you know, kill off all the old unhealthy people in the world and create the demand for the vaccine that I’ve also developed,” Gates said in an exclusive interview with Genesius Times. “And these reckless doctors keep ruining my master plan by figuring out cheap ways to cure the disease. It’s infuriating.”

At the beginning of the year, Gates quit his board positions to focus solely on depopulating the Earth through biological weapons. All was going well well with his first success: COVID-19. That is until doctors began trying different treatments not approved by the health establishment.

“First it was that anti-malarial drug and we sort of scared people away from that with some retracted studies that showed it didn’t help. I think we dodged a bullet with that one,” Gates said. “But now some crazy doctor wants to treat COVID with the generic asthma steroid budesonide? Why my scientists didn’t see this coming is beyond me. It’s maddening. I was supposed to make trillions on my vaccine and this crazy doctor is trying to cure the disease with a generic drug?”

Gates says there’s still hope.

“I still think we have a good grip on the media and people still listen to the news for some reason, so I think we’ll be all right,” Gates said.

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