BREAKING: President Trump pardons notorious war criminal Barack Obama

It’s almost spring. Almost. A wonderful season to be alive. Blooming flowers, birds chirping again as they fly North, love is in the air. It’s also a wonderful time to be pardoning or commuting sentences and since Punxatawny Pete predicts another 6 weeks of winter, President Trump is leaning in and looking forward.

Of course, everyone knows by now that Rod Blagojevich was pardoned yesterday, has been home, re-introduced to his family after 8 years in prison and has already given a Press Conference. We wish him well. Another 10 individuals had an early Christmas this year as well.

But there’s a 12th pardon that very few have heard about…….yet. It’s Barry Soetoro aka Barack Hussein Obama. Of course he isn’t a US citizen. He was born in Kenya to a tribe of Wahhabists, placed in the bullrushes at the banks of the River Jordan, picked up by the Taliban, lived and raised in a secret Madrassas, and groomed for the US Presidency by Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden. He even told us that he was responsible for killing bin Laden but as GT has uncovered, bin Laden is alive and well, living incognito in the openly gay Castro section of San Francisco. He is getting fewer visitors these days since he moved to his rooftop apt but he was quite popular for awhile.

Then there was the ostensible crime of allowing anyone to use any bathroom, locker room or fitting room any time they were feeling a bit randy. Fortunately only 1934 girls were raped under his new bathroom guidelines. Since it never reached the golden number of 2000, it was swept under the rug along with every other Democrat crime committed in the last 50 years.

And what about Benghazi where Obama and HRC allowed their Ambassador and four other soldiers to be tortured and massacred? Is that not mass murder, negligent homicide and Death Penalty qualified? They being Democrats, the above were not considered crimes.

President Trump knows all this. He knows most of the Obama administration should be behind bars. So what does he do? He adds Obama to his list of pardons to show he’s got a big heart, non-partisan, and loves everyone, even past Muslim Presidents. Carry on Barry and enjoy Martha’s Vineyard.