Canada reveals new fully-inclusive LGBTQ+ acronym with 8 billion characters
Canadian activist group Identititarian Linguists Lithograph (ILL) have published a book containing the latest, most inclusive acronym for the LGBTQQIX2+...
Culture
Netanyahu Warns Trump: Vatican City One Month From Nuclear Weapon
Jerusalem – In a late-night phone call that reportedly lasted 47 minutes and included several awkward pauses while aides Googled...
UK Agrees to Let Kanye In If He Converts to Islam and Rapes At Least 5 White Girls During His Stay
LONDON — In a bold move hailed as a triumph for diversity, inclusion, and pragmatic border policy, the British Home...
Pope Leo clarifies: Christ didn’t go to Hell after being crucified; He went to Portland
Vatican City — In a surprise clarification issued from the Apostolic Palace on Holy Saturday, Pope Leo XIV has revised...
Encouraging Positive Money Habits
Money is often one of the most stressful aspects of life. Whether it's keeping up with bills, paying off debt,...
Chicago Bulls Fire Jaden Ivey for Failing to Meet NBA Minimum on Baby Mamas and Cocaine Usage
Chicago, IL — In a stunning move that has sent shockwaves through the league, the Chicago Bulls announced Tuesday the...
BREAKING: White smoke in Tel Aviv indicates that Israel has chosen a new OnlyFans CEO
TEL AVIV — In a development that has left both religious scholars and content creators equally bewildered, thick plumes of...
Women Too Stupid To Get I.D. Relieved To Not Have To Vote Anymore
In a stunning development hailed as both liberating and patriotic, millions of American women have reportedly been freed from the...
2026 Oscars replaced with 2 hours of sustained yelling at a picture of Donald Trump
In a move that even the most jaded Academy voters are calling “pure, unadulterated Oceania chic,” the Motion Picture Academy...
2001: A Space Odyssey Remake Highlights HAL 9000 with ChatGPT Upgrade
Los Angeles, March 2026 — In a move that has already been described as “both inevitable and deeply unnecessary,” Warner...
