BREAKING: DOJ Indicts Hunter Biden for not giving any of his millions in bribes to the government
WASHINGTON, DC—In a peculiar legal maneuver that has raised eyebrows across the nation, the Department of Justice (DOJ) has chosen...
Politics
This Day in Fiery but Mostly-Peaceful History: Japan Bombs Pearl Harbor
(CNN) Japan launched a fiery but mostly peaceful attack on the United States at the Hawaiian naval base Pearl Harbor...
Unemployed Masters Graduate awarded Presidential Medal of Participation by Biden
IOWA—Twenty-eight-year-old Jeremy Daniels was one of several unemployed college graduates who was recognized and awarded a presidential medal of participation...
Ivy League Presidents correct lawmakers: ‘It’s not genocide, it’s *democratic genocide’
In a stunning display of intellectual prowess, Ivy League presidents Liz Magill, Sally Kornbluth, and Claudine Gay have come forward...
AOC: If transwomen aren’t women, why are they winning all the women’s sports?
I've got something super important to talk about. So, like, if transwomen aren't women, why are they winning all the...
France’s impending civil war: a race to see which side surrenders first
PARIS—In a twist that only the French could orchestrate, the land of baguettes and berets finds itself on the brink...
Following Santos’ expulsion for being a lying money launderer, Congress expels all of Congress for being lying money launderers
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking turn of events that left the nation both bewildered and mildly impressed, Congress has collectively expelled...
Due to public outcry, “Baby It’s Cold Outside” has been replaced with, “DaM, Bit¢h It B FreeZin!”
Many activist groups have targeted the popular winter classic "Baby It's Cold Outside" as an artifact of rape culture, citing...
BREAKING: All charges against George Santos dropped after he identifies as a Cherokee Indian veteran who slept with a Chinese spy
WASHINGTON, DC—In a surprising twist that could rival the most intricate plot twists from a spy novel, charges against U.S....
BREAKING: White House Christmas tree falls down to be closer to Joe Biden
WASHINGTON, DC—In a heartwarming display of holiday spirit, the White House Christmas tree took a graceful tumble, making a bold...
