House passes bill outlawing animal cruelty; torturing human babies still okay though

A bill that makes animal cruelty a federal felony was unanimously passed in the House of Representatives on Tuesday.

The bipartisan Preventing Animal Cruelty and Torture (PACT) Act, which was introduced by Reps. Ted Deutch, D-Fla., and Vern Buchanan, R-Fla., would outlaw a form of animal abuse known as “crushing,” where people maim and torture animals.

Cutting the spinal cord, dismembering limbs, and vacuuming the brains of animals will also be prohibited on animals unless that animal is a preborn human.

“This is a big step in codifying a more humane culture and respect for animals—unless that animal is a little human, in which case you can be as cruel as you want!” Deutch said with a chuckle.

“Yeah, it’s important for us to protect all the vulnerable animals out there, unless they’re humans and their mothers want them violently sucked from their lifegiving wombs,” he added.

The felony charge would make it one of the most severe penalties under federal law but lawmakers want you to know there’s still no penalty to kill your baby.