BROKE magazine interviewed The Duke and Duchess of Montecito on their last day in their once lovely, now empty home.

Meghan: The place was too small, anyway.
Harry: It was too close to Oprah. She stinks up the kitchen with her lasagnas.
Broke: We understand you burned through almost 64 million in 17 months.
Meghan: Really?
Ed Note: Meghan gave Harry a quizzical, then stern glance
Harry: I do believe it was less than that. Closer to 60 I would imagine. Did they count the money in the cookie jar too: Perhaps, then.
Broke: So, what’s next for the ‘Hollywood In’ couple?
Harry: I, as man of the family, have considered many options. I’m not sure but I believe there are little ones to think about.
Broke: You mean, your children?
Meghan: (The Duchess held up two fingers and nodded at the Duke.) Harry has many irons in the fire. I believe they are still looking for a host for Jeopardy, are they not?
Broke: I think that job was taken by the producer, or something like that.
Meghan: Really. Well, thank god it wasn’t that urchin from ‘Blossom’. We actually don’t need some sort of work thingy. We have many friends who are rushing to our aid and comfort. Tom Cruise might give us a loan if we join some church or something. Oprah could-
Harry: No, no Oprah. Lasagnas, lasagnas, lasagnas!
Meghan: Fine, okay, don’t get your royal ass in a sling!
Broke: Okay, that is probably all we need for the interview.
Harry: You like lasagna? Please, take some with you. What about you people… help yourselves, please.

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