Ilhan Omar Pleads the Fifth 113 Times on Whether Her Husband Is Her Brother 
Clever Wife Finds Twentieth New Place to Hide the Car Keys This Month 
Louvre Hosts Open House for Looters; “Girl with the Suicidal Empathy” Left Untouched 
Netanyahu Demands 2-State Solution for France Following Unrest 
Macron: “It’s Not a Riot If It’s Not From France’s Riôt Region. This Is Just Sparkling Social Discontent” 
“Un-Named Source” Gets Prime-Time Show On MSNOW
NEW YORK — MSNOW announced Tuesday that it has hired “Un-Named Source” to host a new prime-time program, following the...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Influencer Demands Men Around Her Stop Looking at Her While She Films Video in Public for Followers
In a groundbreaking act of cognitive dissonance, fitness influencer @GluteGoddess69 has issued a stern public demand: strangers must immediately stop...
Trump Taps Literal Gas Light to Replace White House Press Secretary
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump on Friday selected a literal gas light to replace Katie Zacharia as White House press...
Ilhan Omar Spotted Fleeing United States in White Ford Bronco Driven by Brother-Husband
In a scene that struck many observers as both familiar and entirely expected, Representative Ilhan Omar was reportedly seen late...
Liberal Takes Break From Telling Sydney Sweeney to Put More Clothes On to Slam Shane Gillis for Telling Women to Put More Clothes On
In a rare moment of consistency interruption, progressive commentators who have spent recent months urging actress Sydney Sweeney to “put...
Miss United Kingdom Adds ‘Best Burka’ Segment to 2027 Pageant
LONDON — Organisers of the Miss United Kingdom beauty pageant announced Thursday that the competition will introduce a new judged...
Ilhan Omar Asks That You Not Share Her Mug Shot on Social Media
WASHINGTON — Rep. Ilhan Omar issued a statement Tuesday requesting that the public refrain from circulating a recent mugshot in...
DNC Floats Harris-Buttigieg Ticket, Labels Them “Harri/Butt 2028”
WASHINGTON — Democratic National Committee officials are circulating a proposed 2028 presidential ticket pairing former Vice President Kamala Harris with...
Talarico Ends Campaign To Star In “One Flu Over The Cuckoo’s Nest”
AUSTIN, Texas — Democratic U.S. Senate candidate James Talarico announced Tuesday that he is ending his campaign to accept the...
Christa Pike Released From Hospital To Head Democratic National Committee
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Christa Pike, recently released from a local hospital following medical treatment, was appointed chair of the Democratic...
