This Day in Fiery but Mostly-Peaceful History: Japan Bombs Pearl Harbor
(CNN) Japan launched a fiery but mostly peaceful attack on the United States at the Hawaiian naval base Pearl Harbor...
Month: December 2023
Unemployed Masters Graduate awarded Presidential Medal of Participation by Biden
IOWA—Twenty-eight-year-old Jeremy Daniels was one of several unemployed college graduates who was recognized and awarded a presidential medal of participation...
Ivy League Presidents correct lawmakers: ‘It’s not genocide, it’s *democratic genocide’
In a stunning display of intellectual prowess, Ivy League presidents Liz Magill, Sally Kornbluth, and Claudine Gay have come forward...
AOC: If transwomen aren’t women, why are they winning all the women’s sports?
I've got something super important to talk about. So, like, if transwomen aren't women, why are they winning all the...
We’re DINKS and we want you to know how fulfilled we are by letting you know how fulfilled we are
In a world filled with acronyms, we proudly wear the badge of DINK (Dual Income, No Kids). But we're not...
France’s impending civil war: a race to see which side surrenders first
PARIS—In a twist that only the French could orchestrate, the land of baguettes and berets finds itself on the brink...
Following Santos’ expulsion for being a lying money launderer, Congress expels all of Congress for being lying money launderers
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking turn of events that left the nation both bewildered and mildly impressed, Congress has collectively expelled...
Due to public outcry, “Baby It’s Cold Outside” has been replaced with, “DaM, Bit¢h It B FreeZin!”
Many activist groups have targeted the popular winter classic "Baby It's Cold Outside" as an artifact of rape culture, citing...
Local woman discovers perfect balance between work, family, and unreachable expectations
In a stunning turn of events, local woman and self-proclaimed multitasking wizard, Karen Supermomington, has reportedly cracked the elusive code...
BREAKING: All charges against George Santos dropped after he identifies as a Cherokee Indian veteran who slept with a Chinese spy
WASHINGTON, DC—In a surprising twist that could rival the most intricate plot twists from a spy novel, charges against U.S....
