WASHINGTON, DC—The FBI is seeking the public’s help in finding the man known as Science, who as been missing for weeks.

The FBI says Science went missing on or about the same time Russians invaded Ukraine, which they say is totally unrelated.

Prior to his disappearance, Science was on every news station and network giving people fear and hope in uncertain times.

Science is 5’7″ and 148 pounds. He has green eyes, short gray hair. Science also wears glasses and people who know him say that Science has a very annoying voice and an “incredibly punchable face”.

“It is vitally important that we find Science,” FBI Director Christopher Wray said. “Society will no doubt completely collapse without Science, so clearly, this is our number one priority.”

If you have any information on the whereabouts of Science, please contact your local FBI field agent at 1-800-CALL-FBI.

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Exavier Saskagoochie

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