AOC demands neighbor’s Toyota Corona be quarantined while awaiting test results

Coronavirus is upon us. The mortality rate of up to 2 percent in healthy individuals and up to 30 percent for those already compromised. For comparison, Influenza, though far more contagious, only has a mortality rate of about .05 percent and up to 10 percent for the elderly or ill.

Enter freshman congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio Cortez (D-NY). A Harvard grad, Rhodes scholar, winner of the 2020 ‘Most Definitely The Smartest Person Around Award’ and a PhD in ‘Historical Perspectives in Puerto Rican Ice Fishing.’

The world is asking! What does AOC recommend? How is the future of mankind going to be preserved? AOC, realizing that Japan is near China and Toyota a Japanese company, has introduced emergency legislation to get every single Toyota Corona off the roads, especially her neighbor’s eyesore.

“These are super ugly cars, and I think they get horrible gas mileage. To think that they could be spreading coronavirus is just the last straw,” Ocasio-Cortez said.

“Hey, we’re probably all gonna burn up in 12 years anyway, but just in case we don’t, we need to isolate these cars, check their engine oil, monitor that little temperature thingy on the dashboard, put tiny weeny surgical masks on all the bobbleheads and get one of those super-sized surgical masks to fit around the hood. Don’t y’all worry, I’m on this thing like white on rice, well brown rice, not white rice……….. whatever,” she added.