BREAKING: Republican Lisa Murkowski threatens to keep voting like a Democrat if Trump is nominee
ANCHORAGE—In a surprising twist of political theater, Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski has issued a bold ultimatum to the Republican Party:...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: CIA claims responsibility for ISIS claiming responsibility for Moscow terror attack
WASHINGTON, DC—The Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) has claimed responsibility for the Islamic State (ISIS) claiming responsibility for the recent Moscow...
AOC: If we just make everything the Bidens did legal, then they didn’t do anything wrong
WASHINGTON, DC—The ever-inspiring Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has proposed a groundbreaking solution to put an end to all those niggling concerns...
BREAKING: King Charles is not dead; posts photo to show that he is alive and well
LONDON—The British Royal Family has released an adorable photo of King Charles III enjoying a day in with his beloved...
‘Fetuses are parasites’ says vice president who lives completely on extorted taxpayer money
WASHINGTON, DC—In a recent interview, Vice President Kamala Harris has found herself embroiled in controversy after referring to fetuses as...
Kate Middleton tweets out selfie of her and her kids on the moon; crazy conspiracy theorists doubt its legitimacy
LONDON—In a stunning revelation that has left the internet reeling, the Duchess of Cambridge has taken to Twitter to share...
BREAKING: Boeing jets come out as trans-safe: they are not safe but they ‘identify as safe’
SEATTLE—In a groundbreaking turn of events, Boeing has announced that their planes are now officially trans-safe. This comes as a...
Mark Ruffalo and Ramy Youssef demand Israel stop bombing innocent babies in Gaza so the Gazans can go kill innocent babies in abortion
HOLLYWOOD—In a move that has left political analysts scratching their heads, Hollywood actors Mark Ruffalo and Ramy Youssef have come...
Local men dominate International Women’s Day
The 2023 International Women's Day was a great success, focusing mainly on local men who think they're women. "Really, the...
Democrats praise Biden for not dying during State of the Union address
WASHINGTON, DC—Without much to celebrate, Democrats turned to the old failsafe of the president not dying during the speech as...
