BREAKING: East Palestine, OH changes name to Palestine to get Biden to visit
EAST PALESTINE, OH—In a truly audacious move that has left the nation both bewildered and amused, the tiny town of...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Fox News unanimously declares Jeb Bush Speaker of the House
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning and, some would say, bewildering turn of events, Fox News, the network known for its unique...
BREAKING: AOC forced to pay a carbon offset penalty for her livestream flatulent
WASSHINGTON, DC—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY), often recognized for her passionate climate advocacy, has found herself in hot air - quite...
Ozzy Osbourne hired to interpret Joe Biden
WASHINGTON, DC—Weeks into Joe Biden's presidency, Democratic strategists have finally find someone capable of interpreting what the hell he is...
BREAKING: Biden includes Hamas terrorists in impressive 336,000 new jobs report
WASHINGTON, DC—In a truly baffling turn of events, President* Biden's administration has managed to find a silver lining in the...
BREAKING: CIA accidentally gives $3 billion to Trump supporter disguised as Hamas terrorist
WASHINGTON, DC--We reported on a Trump supporter who disguised himself as a Hamas terrorist in order to be removed from...
Newsom celebrates Indigenous Peoples’ Day by sacrificing 666 people to climate goddess Greta
SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom will be celebrating Indigenous Peoples' Day at the capitol by sacrificing six unlucky human beings to...
Sacrifice a human and 7 more ways to celebrate Indigenous Peoples’ Day
Everyone knows that if you celebrate Columbus Day, you’re a Nazi bigot, so that’s why most woke cultures and municipalities...
AOC horrified that Hamas used gas-powered vehicles to terrorize Israel instead of electric vehicles
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning twist of events, Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, known for her passionate advocacy of environmental issues, expressed shock...
QUIZ: Caused by the Hamas terrorist attack on Israel or a mostly-peaceful BLM riot?
This is probably our most difficult quiz yet. Can you tell the difference between a Hamas terrorist attack and a...
