BREAKING: Biden finally visits Hawaii for a nice vacation upwind of devastating wildfires
In a groundbreaking move that has left both citizens and palm trees in awe, President* Biden has announced his long-awaited...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Joe Biden appoints Hunter Biden to lead investigation of Hunter Biden
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has appointed his son Hunter Biden to lead the investigation of Hunter Biden following revelations that...
Arsonist changes name to ‘Climate Change’ so that people can say Climate Change causes wildfires
MAUI, HI—An arsonist who has started several fires in Hawaii, Oregon, and California has legally changed his name to "Climate...
BREAKING: FBI kills man because he made threats to a president who isn’t Trump
In a bizarre case of mistaken presidential identity, the FBI has reportedly taken swift action by eliminating a man who...
Biden Department of Justice officially changes name to ‘Department of Just Us’
WASHINGTON, DC—The President* Biden Department of Justice has officially changed its name to the US Department of Just Us, according...
US Women’s Soccer Team promises to win next World Cup by replacing all the women with high school boys
In an unexpected twist to boost their chances at the next World Cup, the US Women's Soccer Team has unveiled...
BREAKING: Biden makes campaign stop at Delaware cemetery
In a bold move that defies all traditional campaign strategies, President Joe Biden has been spotted hitting the campaign trail...
BREAKING: Obama chef Tafari Campbell’s death ruled as ‘climate change’
In a shocking turn of events, the tragic death of former and current President Barack Obama's chef Tafari Campbell has...
Mattel offering free abortions with purchase of each Barbie movie ticket
HOLLYWOOD—In a bold marketing move that left parents everywhere questioning their sanity, toy giant Mattel has announced an unexpected promotion...
BREAKING: Obama’s chef has information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton
MASSACHUSETTS—Obama's world famous chef Tafari Campbell has information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton. Campbell says that...
