WASHINGTON, DC—Nothing says “anti-fascism” quite like enforcing the medical tyranny of a Deep State puppet! That’s what thousands of newly employed Antifa activists have decided after being employed by President* Joe Biden to enforce his vaccine mandate.
“I hadn’t been paid for, like, a real job since I got my Soros check for protesting and smashing up various cities across the country last year,” Portland Antifa President Winkie McLittlejon said. “Now I really feel like I have an anti-fascist purpose, you know, to make sure people succumb to a global medical experiment at the behest of Pfizer and the federal government.”
The activists, who fought tirelessly in 2020 to bring down the system will now be enforcing the system, brought to you by Pfizer.
“I always thought, you know, like all cops are bastards. That’s what ACAB means,” McLittlejon said. “But that’s before I like became a cop. Now I love cops—at least cops that are enforcing unconstitutional laws created by the pharmaceutical-industrial complex.”
Biden said that it has been a great jobs program.
“We looked at it and said, we have this group of folks not doing anything; living in their parents’ basement. And we said, why not give them billions of taxpayer money to do something good for humanity?” Biden said through his translator.
“We’re calling them the National Socialist Vaccine Police, which I think has a nice ring to it. That way they can pretend to maintain their political ideology when in fact they’re all just a bunch of Nazis,” Biden added.