BREAKING: World shocked that a marriage with moral exemplar Miley Cyrus failed
The world is in shock after learning that the marriage between Liam Hemsworth and complete degenerate and whore Miley Cyrus failed.
“I can’t believe it,” true Miley fan Michelle Maroon tweeted. “I really thought this match made in Heaven that would stand the test of time.”
Per documents obtained by Genesius Times, the Australian actor, 29, filed for divorce from the pop star/prostitute, 26, in Los Angeles on Wednesday. According to The Blast, Hemsworth — who has hired famed Hollywood divorce attorney Laura Wasser — cited “irreconcilable differences.”
The civil marriage lasted all of 7 months.
“No one saw this coming,” pop culture scholar Gary Jacky said. “It’s just really hard to believe that someone couldn’t love a person who gave herpes to a cake inscribed with ‘abortion is healthcare‘. I’m in shock.”
“It’s almost as if completely sacrificing your sexual dignity at every chance you get isn’t good for a life-long marital union. They did everything right in the eyes of the modern world. It’s a mystery as to why this union failed.”
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