The first Democratic debate was boring by most accounts until the topic of abortion came around. At that point, the debate became a contest of who on the stage had killed more innocent humans.

Washington Governor Jay Inslee said that he had overseen the slaughter of more innocent babies than any governor before him. “I’ve probably killed about a million!”

Robert O’Rourke said in Spanish he killed many undocumented Mexican babies as well as legal American babies.

At one point Sen. Elizabeth Warren lifted up her taxidermy mount of a fetus she had personally killed and said, “I bet you don’t have one of these you faker!”

Cory Booker became crazed and ran into the audience looking for an innocent human to kill.

“If there’s one thing that the Democrats do well, it’s kill innocent humans!” one commentator said.

About Author

Exavier Saskagoochie

Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He’s really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!

See author's posts