Sources have informed Trump that the Federal Reserve is just 2 weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon
WASHINGTON, DC—Sources for Genesius Times have confirmed that the Federal Reserve is a mere two weeks from completing a fully...
Donald Trump
BREAKING: Federal Judge overturns the killing of Iranian Ayatollah Khamenei
In a ruling that has left both the Pentagon and Tehran simultaneously relieved and mildly embarrassed, U.S. District Judge Hugh...
Ilhan Omar Condemns Trump’s Iran Strikes as ‘Racist Against Terrorists’
MINNEAPOLIS — In a blistering floor speech that lasted exactly as long as the average commercial break, Rep. Ilhan Omar...
BREAKING: Minnesota Just Weeks Away from Developing Nuclear Weapon, Sources Say
ST. PAUL, Minn. — Intelligence officials confirmed today that Minnesota is mere weeks—possibly days—from achieving a fully operational nuclear weapon,...
BREAKING: Marco Rubio named new Supreme Leader of Iran
In a stunning development that has left foreign policy analysts reaching for their atlases, President Donald J. Trump announced today...
BREAKING: Trump bombs Iran so that he can get a Nobel Peace Prize like Obama
In a bold move to secure lasting global recognition, President Donald J. Trump authorized precision airstrikes on multiple Iranian military...
Mitch McConnell blinks twice to indicate vehement opposition to SAVE America Act
Washington, D.C. — In a dramatic escalation of nonverbal parliamentary procedure, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) today registered his...
SCOTUS rules that the federal government can only tax Americans to death—not other countries
In a landmark 6-3 decision handed down today, the Supreme Court clarified once and for all that the federal government...
Trump gains liberal support by renaming ICE ‘Planned Citizenship’
In an appeal to pro-choice progressives protesting the detention center at the Mexican border, President Trump has renamed the US...
BREAKING: Trump Ends Minnesota Standoff by Trading Minneapolis for Alberta, Canada
Washington, D.C. – In a move described by White House officials as "the art of the deal on a continental...
