Groundhog Day 2025: Punxsutawney Phil predicts 6 more weeks of Liberal Tears
Punxsutawney, PA – In what has become an annual tradition of political prognostication, Punxsutawney Phil, the world's most famous groundhog,...
Year: 2025
Charli XCX criticized for making a bunch of annoying noises during her Grammys porn show
HOLLYWOOD—In what can only be described as a bewildering assault on the auditory senses, Charli XCX took to the stage...
BREAKING: Thousands of liberals commit suicide after Trump declares: ‘I want to save American lives’
Thousands of brave liberals across the country have committed suicide in response to President Trump's declaration in a press conference...
BREAKING: Army releases identity of pilot in DC helicopter collision
Washington, DC – In an astonishing turn of events that has left the nation both baffled and amused, the U.S....
Gaza goat population explodes as Trump ends condom giveaway
Gaza City - In a surprising turn of events, Gaza's goat population is set to undergo a significant boom, following...
Media horrified as Trump replaces literal gaslight Press Secretary with an actual human who answers questions
WASHINGTON, DC—President Donald Trump has decided to replace the infamous gaslight, which had served as an unconventional press secretary for...
BREAKING: Mexican President to Trump: ‘How dare you send back all those migrants who help your economy so much!’
MEXICO CITY - In a fiery display of diplomatic audacity, Mexican President Claudia Sheinbaum has publicly lambasted President Donald Trump...
BREAKING: Democrats demand that Trump stop deporting their voters
WASHINGTON, D.C. -The Democratic Party has issued an official demand to President Donald Trump, urging him to halt the deportation...
Lyft launches ‘Forklyft’: the Ride-Sharing Service for the Morbidly Obese
In an unexpected twist following the recent lawsuit filed by Detroit rapper Dank Demoss against Lyft, the ride-sharing giant has...
