Everyone at the Emmys wins award for pretending to care
HOHLLYWOOD—Seth Rogan won the first award of the night for virtue signaling about COVID right off the bat. "Good to...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Ghost of Norm MacDonald joins Genesius Times
Most of the comedy world was shaken by the announcement of the passing of comedian Norm MacDonald, who Steven Crowder...
US Capitol Police increase security ahead of Saturday’s FBI false flag event
WASHINGTON, DC—The U.S. Capitol Police is erecting a temporary fence around the Capitol in anticipation of a planned FBI false flag...
Biden mandates shoving marbles up everyone’s asses after tweet by Nicki Minaj
WASHINGTON, DC--President* Biden has issued a rare edict mandating that all Americans have marbles shoved up their asses to fight...
AOC wears ‘Eat the Rich’ dress to Met Gala then literally eats 4 rich guests
NEW YORK—US representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has never been one to shy away from controversy. While attending the $30,000 per...
BREAKING: Fox News calls tomorrow’s California recall election for Gavin Newsom
SACRAMENTO—Fox News has officially called tomorrow's California recall election for Governor Gavin Newsom hours before in-person voting has begun. After...
BREAKING: Biden mandates proof of vaccination or proof you’re an illegal alien to keep working
WASHINGTON, DC—He tried encouraging. He tried cajoling. He tried dangling gifts and all manner of incentives. But eight months into...
The Institute of Unfinished Research has determined that 6 out of 10 people
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA--A new study published by the Institute of Unfinished Research has determined that 6 out of 10 people....
Feds working to restore power to Ida victims so they can get back to spying on them
NEW ORLEANS--Federal agents are working feverishly to restore power the victims of Hurricane Ida in Louisiana, New Jersey, and New...
Biden mandates a forehead tattoo of ‘build back better’ as national vaccine passport
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden announced today that he will be mandating a national vaccine passport in order for people to...
