BREAKING: FBI thoroughly investigating the source of Matt Gaetz’s perfect hair
WASHINGTON, DC--The Federal Bureau of Investigation has been working on a shocking case involving US Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL). The...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Texas publishes helpful map for Californians looking to move to the state
AUSTIN—The Texas Board of Californian Resettlement (TBCR) has published a helpful map for all the Californians seeking asylum in their...
To ensure equality, NBA will now end all games in 93-93 tie
LOS ANGELES—The National Basketball Association is putting its money where its social justice mouth is. To ensure equality in the...
3 Stacey Abrams romance novels including ‘Moby Dick: A Love Story’ to be reissued
ATLANTA—Before she ran for governor of Georgia, before she registered 800,000 dead voters with her organization Fair Fight, before she...
BREAKING: Melinda Gates will become the 3rd richest man in the world after divorce
SEATTLE—Bill and Melinda Gates have announced their divorce after 27 years of marriage. The split will make Melinda the third...
BREAKING: Shady Arizona election audit officials cover windows with cardboard; eject observers
MARICOPA COUNTY, AZ--As tensions continue to build over allegations of irregularities in the shady audit of the 2020 presidential election...
Every NFL team has selected Joe Biden as their first pick in 2021 NFL Draft
CLEVELAND--Each year there are some big surprises in the NFL Draft but no one was ready for this year when...
VIDEO: Police officer consults LeBron before interfering in a knife attack
WOKETARDIA—This is how it should be done people! Every police officer in the country needs to consult with LeBron James...
CDC announces if you wear two swim suits you can pee in the pool this summer
ATLANTA—US health officials at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) have issued new guidelines for swimming in the...
Biden says it’s not racist to be racist to Tim Scott because ‘he ain’t black’
WASHINGTON, DC—In a brave progressive move, President Joe Biden, who's white, defended people who hurled racial epithets toward America's only...
