STUDY: Time travels 3.4 times faster using a chocolate Advent calendar
Albert Einstein would have appreciated this news. A new study released in the Annals of Physics has shown that time...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
London’s Khan bans fire extinguishers and narwhal tusks after they were used to stop terror attack
London Mayor Sadiq Khan has banned all fire extinguishers and Narwhal tusks after two civilians used the devices to stop...
Democrats fly dozens to Spain to learn about how to pollute less
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi announced Saturday that she will fly a squadron of Democratic lawmakers to the United Nations conference on how...
POLL: Baby Yoda leads all Democrats for 2020 Presidential bid despite not running or being real
A cute little fictional sci-fi character has soared to the top spot in the Democratic primary field, leading his nearest...
Bernie Sanders showed up to Thanksgiving dinner without a dish again
Presidential hopeful and long-time taxpayer freeloader Bernie Sanders showed up for his family's Thanksgiving dinner without bringing a dish again...
Conservative transgender fired from Drag Queen Story Hour for ‘just sitting there reading’
Conservative transgender woman Beatrice Arnold was fired from a Pittsburgh area library Drag Queen Story Hour for not being perverted...
Fetuses self-identifying as pit bulls after Trump signs federal animal cruelty ban into law
In a rare display of political unity, President Trump on Monday signed a bipartisan bill that, for the first time,...
Local Bernie fan complains about having 23 options for Thanksgiving dessert
A local Bernie Sanders fan is planning on yelling about the evils and inadequacies of capitalism—especially having so many dessert...
Local man who’s never given a dollar to charity mad Jeff Bezos only donated $98.5 million to homeless
A local man who has never donated to any charity is infuriated that Amazon Founder and CEO Jeff Bezos didn't...
Queen generously gives Prince Andrew all-expenses paid vacation to special Parisian tunnel
Queen Elizabeth gave Prince Andrew the royal sendoff as he embarked on an all-expenses paid vacation to a special Parisian...
