Social justice warriors condemn white blood cells for oppressing cells of color
A new trend among self-professed social justice warriors at American universities is a medical treatment aimed at eliminating white blood...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Most diverse Congress ever sworn in includes living turd
It was a historic swearing in ceremony Thursday as the most diverse United States House of Representatives was sworn in...
Transgender woman destroys game shop; wonders why people don’t treat her like a lady
In a barbaric rage, a biological man who prefers to be called a woman, destroyed a game store in Albuquerque,...
“Terrifying”: thousands injured while looking at monuments during government shutdown
Thousands of people have been reported injured while looking at inanimate stone monuments across the United States spurring worries about...
Millions of young people anxiously waiting to be told what they should be offended by in 2019
Millions of college students and millennials are anxiously awaiting to be told what they should be offended by in the...
Local child miraculously has only broken 18 bones after three days on hoverboard
A local 8-year-old girl, Felicity, is experiencing a Christmas miracle not breaking every bone in her body after three days...
Hollywood to implement socialist policy; everyone will get Best Actor Oscar in 2019
Ever since the McCarthy trials, the movie industry has been inundated with socialists and communists, claiming that the economic system...
Liberals furious that Trump keeps doing what they were going to do
A series of egregious actions by President Trump is sending liberal opposition into a furious tailspin. In the last week...
Social justice warrior super excited to ruin Christmas for everyone
Sixteen-year-old Taylor Towns of Newberry is a self-proclaimed social justice warrior who spends most of her time on Snapchat and...
Fan still ‘pretty sure’ Bernie Sanders can win the 2016 presidential election
It's been over two years since the 2016 presidential election, but Bernie Sanders fans—Bernie Bros—are still "pretty sure" he can...
