BREAKING: Biden vows to punish whoever released illegal leaks all over the White House
In a statement released today, the Biden administration has vowed to find and punish whoever is responsible for repeatedly releasing...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Insurrection is okay again
(CNN) NASHVILLE—More than a 1,000 mostly peaceful protestors rallied around Tennessee’s state Capitol on March 30 calling for more restrictive...
BREAKING: Bud Light now made from 100% organic trans women’s piss
ST LOUIS—In a stunning move, Bud Light has announced that it will now be made from 100% organic trans women's...
Netflix Presents: Polar Bears, a Documentary
Netflix has just announced its latest nature documentary, "Polar Bears, a Documentary." The documentary follows the adventures of a polar...
BREAKING: Democrats promise to keep killing kids until you give up your guns
WASHINGTON, DC—Congressional Democrats have promised to keep killing your kids until you give up your guns. Former Speaker of the...
BREAKING: Biden to confiscate all Americans’ guns to give them to Ukraine
Washington D.C. - In a shocking move that has left gun rights advocates reeling, President Joe Biden has announced that...
Biden calls for national day of mourning for trans person who was viciously misgendered after mostly peacefully killing some people
(CNN) WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has announced that he will be calling for a national day of mourning for Audrey...
BREAKING: Rob Reiner hospitalized with severe addiction to AI-generated Trump arrest porn
NEW YORK–Vocal leftist Rob Reiner was hospitalized yesterday with a severe addiction to Trump arrest porn. Reiner fell victim to...
Pornhub launches new section for AI-generated Trump arrest porn
US—Nothing gets a beta male soy boy hotter than AI-generated images of former President Donal Trump being arrested in New...
BREAKING: In response to Biden’s illegal business deal with China, DOJ to arrest Donald Trump
WASHINGTON, DC—In response to new revelations of illegal business dealings with China, The Department of Justice have issued an arrest...
