Child Abuse Hotline volunteer shocked when Joe Biden tried to ‘place an order’
WASHINGTON, DC—A volunteer for the local Child Abuse Hotline service was shocked when she received a call from President* Joe...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Buffalo hammered with 6 feet of Global Warming over the weekend
BUFFALO, New York—New York residents in Buffalo and other parts of the state are waking this morning to up to...
Maricopa to produce theatrical version of ‘Dumb and Dumber’ to entertain while they count votes
PHOENIX—During a flawless election cycle in which upwards of 30% of voters were disenfranchised and has taken over a week...
BREAKING: California launches guaranteed income program for all human turds in the state
California has launched a guaranteed income program for the state's human turd residents to help with financial insecurity. Governor Gavin Newsom...
EXCLUSIVE VIDEO: US reacts to Nancy Pelosi stepping down from Party leadership
Speaker of the US House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi (D-NY), who failed to have her husband killed last month, has...
BREAKING: Jimmy Fallon has died from complications of climate change
Fans from across the world are mourning the passing of Jimmy Fallon, who died yesterday from complications of extreme climate...
BREAKING: Fox News calls Arizona for Biden in 2024 election
(FOX NEWS) Fox News has officially called the state of Arizona for Joe Biden in the 2024 presidential election. While...
World stunned to hear a US president form complete sentences for the first time in years
MAR-A-LAGO--Viewers around the world were shocked and stunned to hear a president make coherent points and form complete sentences for...
Nearly 6% of Americans believe the crazy conspiracy theory that US elections are legitimate
US—A shockingly high 6% of the US population believe the crazy conspiracy theory that their elections are free and fair...
In response to Biden-Ukraine-FTX money laundering scandal, Congress to impeach Trump again
US—Rocked by revelations that now-bankrupt cryptocurrency company FTX and Alameda Hedge Fund used Ukrainian aid to donate to Democratic political...
