Local man who’s never given a dollar to charity mad Jeff Bezos only donated $98.5 million to homeless
A local man who has never donated to any charity is infuriated that Amazon Founder and CEO Jeff Bezos didn't...
Business
Chik-Fil-A now offering all you can eat buffet for 30 pieces of silver
In the wake of ditching his religious convictions, the CEO of Chick-Fil-A, Dan Cathy, has announced the restaurant will simultaneously...
Chik-fil-A gives into pressure groups; will stop serving delicious chicken and slaughter its mascot cows
In a shocking turn of events Chik-fil-A has given into pressure-groups and will stop serving delicious chicken with a smile....
AOC says she was ‘just kidding about that Green New Deal stuff’ as she cranks the heat up to 72°
US Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has been making the case for reducing fossil fuels use and reducing one's carbon footprint. But...
Ukraine repays ‘Friend of the State’ Joe Biden with new coin
Amidst controversy regarding the Donald Trump impeachment, the Republic of Ukraine has honored the long-time "Friend of the State" Joe...
DNC unveils nanny tranny program for freshman congresspersons
In an effort to become more universally inclusive, the Democratic National Convention has kicked off a new program that pairs...
BREAKING: Popeyes goes 24 hours without a brawl or shooting
In what some are calling a miracle, the fast food chain Popeyes has made it 24 hours without a brawl...
Millennial stunned he didn’t get a job after replying “OK Boomer” to every interview question
Local Millennial Braiden Stone was stunned he didn't get a job for a prominent tech firm in the area after...
BREAKING: Jeffrey Epstein confesses to killing himself in 2019, quashing conspiracy theories
Disgraced financier Jeffrey Epstein has confessed to killing himself in a New York jail, quashing months of Internet skepticism and...
Uber investors predict massive losses to lift stock price
Investor Fred Smith was dismayed to discover that the fact Uber has never turned a profit and is unlikely ever...
