AOC applauds Biden’s gas lines; demands breadlines too
WASHINGTON, DC—Democratic socialist Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) applauded President* Biden on his dramatic push toward a total socialist state like...
Newsbeat
BREAKING: FBI apprehends suspect of Colonial Pipeline cyberhack
WASHINGTON, DC—FBI Director Christopher Wray announce today that the FBI has apprehended their primary suspect in the Colonial Pipeline cyberhack,...
BREAKING: FBI thoroughly investigating the source of Matt Gaetz’s perfect hair
WASHINGTON, DC--The Federal Bureau of Investigation has been working on a shocking case involving US Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL). The...
Man who frightened everyone on plane by coughing and sneezing turns out to only have a cold
UNITED STATES—A horrifying incident occurred on a United Airlines passenger plane today when a passenger starting coughing and sneezing, terrifying...
CNN will no longer fact check Biden because his lies are ‘mostly true’
(CNN) We at CNN pride ourselves in being the premier fact checker in the world of journalism (how refreshing). We...
Census report reveals disturbing number of American citizens living in the US
WASHINGTON, DC—The 2020 Census Report is out and predictably, everyone is focused on how the Census will affect the number...
BREAKING: Shady Arizona election audit officials cover windows with cardboard; eject observers
MARICOPA COUNTY, AZ--As tensions continue to build over allegations of irregularities in the shady audit of the 2020 presidential election...
VIDEO: Police officer consults LeBron before interfering in a knife attack
WOKETARDIA—This is how it should be done people! Every police officer in the country needs to consult with LeBron James...
Iranian government hires Kerry as new propaganda minister
TEHRAN, IRAN—Iranian President Hassan Rouhani announced today via Twitter that the Iranian government has hired John Kerry as its new...
CDC says you can now peak your head out from your self-imposed prison once a day
NEW YORK (AP) — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) said Tuesday that you can finally peak your...
