WASHINGTON, DC—Congressional Democrats proposed a House Resolution today which would make the Palestinian Territories the 51^st state of the Union. The name of the newly-proposed state would be the ‘State of Palestine’.

Reports indicate that Democrats have been working on the proposal for weeks already. Many Democratic lawmakers think that while D.C. statehood is unfeasible and a losing issue, their current proposal may garner more support from both sides of the political aisle.

“The Palestinians have suffered far too long,” Rep. Rashida Tlaib (D-Hamas) said. “They’ve been stateless for decades. Their oppression and suffering are beyond anyone’s imagination. It’s only right that we admit the Palestinian Territories as the 51^st state of the United States. It’s the moral thing to do.”

According to the proposal, the State of Palestine would have its own state government, governed by former members of Hamas, which made Representatives Rashida Tlaib and Ilhan Omar especially happy. It will receive two senators like every state, and will have six congressional representatives in proportion to its population. It will also receive a total of eight votes in the Electoral College.

The new state’s slogan will be, “The Terrorist State.”

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Rafi Metz

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