Dems to ban all forms of communication as they promote hate speech


Congressional Democrats are poised to ban all forms of communication as they promote hate speech. After intense debate about the ban, leaders said that it was best to avoid communication altogether than to allow hate to proliferate.

“We must put an end to all this hate,” Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi said in a press conference following the debate. “That is our number one priority as a nation. Therefore, we must do what it takes and that means eliminating all forms of communication.”

Citizens will no longer be able to use social media, television, or radio. They will not be able to talk to strangers either.

“Everyone will be forced to walk around, face down, avoiding everyone else for the foreseeable future,” Pelosi clarified.

Some in the ranks disapproved. “This is absurd,” Representative Oman said. “I believe that only people who do not hate according to our strict criteria should be able to communicate with others.”

The ban on communication still has to pass the Senate and get a signature from President Trump, which seems unlikely, but still a possibility.

Facecrook CEO Mark Schuckerface said that the plan is genius. “Hate has no place on our platform and so we should not let anyone use the platform because everyone hates a little.”

The slogan for the campaign is “Ban All Communication for the Love” or BACFTL.


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