BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
Farewell, X: Why I’m Leaving Over Their Refusal to Censor Me 
Bernie declares eating $6.2 million duct-taped bananas a human right to be paid for by government 
Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
EXCLUSIVE: First Images from the James Webb Space Telescope
(NASA) The dawn of a new era in astronomy has begun as the world gets its first look at the...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Anti-Defamation League labels ‘2+2=4’ a hate symbol
LOS ANGELES (CNN)—The math equation "2+2=4" is now a hate symbol, according to a new report by the Anti-Defamation League....
BREAKING: Presidential Limo ‘The Beast’ at center of Jan 6 hearing is found dead in apparent suicide
WASHINGTON, DC—The armored presidential limousine dubbed "The Beast", which is at the center of the January 6 Commission investigation, has...
BREAKING: Unvaxxed, unhealthy, sick, risk to all of society, person wins Wimbledon
WIMBLEDON, ENGLAND—An unhealthy, unvaxxed, sick, risk to society somehow won one of the most grueling sporting events in the world:...
Experts agree this is how the US will look in 3 years if we don’t reverse climate change now
US—In an utterly horrifying projection, experts across the client science field agreed that this picture is how the US will...
Justin Trudeau gives touching homage to former Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe
OTTAWA—World leaders past and present expressed shock and sadness at the death of former Japanese prime minister Shinzo Abe, who was...
Megan Rapinoe bravely stands on American flag while receiving the Presidential Medal of Honor
WASHINGTON, DC—Soccer player Megan Rapinoe bravely stood on an American flag while receiving the Presidential Medal of Honor from President*...
Mitch McConnell posts video of himself twerking to drum up support for midterms
WASHINGTON, DC—After Rhode Island state Senator Tiara Mack gained massive social reactions for posting a video of herself twerking on...
New FBI Child ID App lets you upload pics of your kids directly to Hunter Biden’s laptop
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the stunning success covering up for President* Joe Biden's son Hunter's laptop full of child pornography, the FBI...
Harvard discontinues all Masters degrees due to problematic tie to the slave-era word ‘master’
BOSTON—In an unprecedented move, the elite Ivy League university Harvard has discontinued all Masters degree programs because of the problematic...
