Talarico Polling Near 100 Percent Among Texas Lizard People 
Biblical Scholars Now Conclude Eve Answered “Not to My Knowledge” When Asked About the Fruit 
Ilhan Omar Comes Out of Hiding for an Appearance on Jerry Springer 
AOC: ‘These poor pumpkins have been drained of their spice by illegal poachers; this needs to stop!’ 
SURPRISE: Obama Defends Foreign-Born Politician Who Ran Under Another Name After Marriage Questions 
AOC: Stop killing ducks to make duck tape!
Hello, beautiful Earth warriors! It's your friendly neighborhood AOC here, and today, I need to talk to you about a...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Joe Biden seeks to be the first US president to start a world war and a civil war in the same year
President* Joe Biden has reportedly decided to make history by simultaneously kickstarting both World War III and a Civil War,...
BREAKING: Taylor Swift is going to the Super Bowl her first year after being drafted by the Kansas City Chiefs
KANSAS CITY—Taylor swift is going to the Super Bowl in her first year after being drafted by the Kansas City...
NYC to replace Thomas Jefferson statue with a statue of George Floyd robbing a pregnant woman at gunpoint
NEW YORK CITY—In a bold move toward modernizing public spaces, New York City has announced plans to replace the statue...
Texas Razorwire Allowed To Stay After it Identifies As a Harmless Slinky
In a baffling yet oddly poetic turn of events, the controversial razor wire lining the Texas border has declared its...
BREAKING: Biden federalizes Texas National Guard troops, sends them to defend Ukraine’s border
WASHINGTON, DC—In an unexpected twist that could rival the most intricate spy novel, President Joe Biden has taken a decisive...
BREAKING: After seeing border crisis first hand in Texas, Biden promises to send $20B more to secure Ukraine’s border
EL PASO—President* Joe Biden walked a muddy stretch of the U.S.-Mexico border and inspected a busy port of entry Sunday on his...
Biden Warns U.S. Constitution Is Likely ‘Russian Disinformation’
WASSHINGTON, DC—In a jaw-dropping revelation that has left legal scholars and history enthusiasts bewildered, President Joe Biden took to the...
TX Gov Abbott installs more razor wire along the Southern border to halt the catastrophic effects of climate change
EAGLE PASS, TX—In a groundbreaking move that has left both environmentalists and immigration advocates scratching their heads, Texas Governor Greg...
BREAKING: Nikki Haley Wins New Hampshire Democrat Primary
CONCORD, New Hampshire—In a stunning turn of events, Nimrata Haley, the Republican candidate, emerged victorious in the New Hampshire Democrat...
