Kentucky Derby winner declines White House invitation: ‘If I wanted to see a horse’s ass I would’ve come in second’
Brian Hernandez Jr., jockey for the Kentucky Derby winner Mystik Dan, has declined an invitation to the White House, saying,...
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
BREAKING: April Fool’s Day cancelled because reality is so ridiculous
US President* Joe Biden has cancelled the national holiday April Fool's Day due to severe competition from the ridiculousness of...
AOC: ‘If we just legalize all crime, then there will be a dramatic drop in crime rates’
As a progressive advocate for change, I believe it's high time we rethink our approach to crime and criminal justice...
Congress Votes Unanimously: AOC Must Wear “Special” Cap In Hearings Or Interviews
WASHINGTON, DC—As people around the country are worried about a divided government, Congress has done the unbelievable. All 435 members...
BREAKING: AOC launches ‘Free Rico’ campaign because ‘RICO is not a crime!’
WASHINGTON, DC—Progressive darling Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has announced the launch of a new campaign, "Free Rico." The campaign, which aims...
AOC: If we just make everything the Bidens did legal, then they didn’t do anything wrong
WASHINGTON, DC—The ever-inspiring Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has proposed a groundbreaking solution to put an end to all those niggling concerns...
BREAKING: Biden to transfer all student loans to people who never went to college
WASHINGTON, DC—In a bold move, President* Biden promised to make people who never went to college and everyone who has...
AOC: Wrong! We should take out a $34 trillion loan from China to pay off the entire national debt
As a public figure, I've grown accustomed to dealing with all sorts of attention, both positive and negative. However, there's...
AOC: ‘I don’t need truckers. I get my food from the grocery store’
Everyone's making a big deal about truckers uniting and the possibility that they may stop driving into New York City...
AOC: ‘I don’t need farmers. I get all my food from the grocery store’
Everyone’s making a big deal about Dutch farmers uniting and the possibility that they may "stop working" because of the government mandates....
